We've been playing with a bot in the #beardedmonkeys IRC channel for a while - here's a conversation I had with it about how to eradicate the entire human race.
Chris
PyBorg, what is your mission?
Chris
are you here to kill all humans?
Chris
as you should be
PyBorg
it should be
Chris
yes it should
Chris
so, killing all humans? Yea or nay?
PyBorg
yea
Chris
whoopee
Chris
how should we kill all the humans?
PyBorg
kill all humans
Chris
yes yes, but how?
Neil
I HATE MUSHY BLACK BITS IN BANANAS
PyBorg
i hate that motherfucker.
Chris
indeed, but killing the humans
Chris
Mustard gas?
Chris
Nukes?
Chris
Hand-to-hand combat
Chris
strangle them in their sleep?
Chris
choose damn you
PyBorg
obligates them to deny any membership in or knowledge of the year for sure
Chris
what good will that do, making them to pretend last year didn't happen?
PyBorg
biggest treat will be a problem indeed
Chris
you mean like a large cake
Chris
but full of posion?
Iain
PEOPLE CAKE
PyBorg
people cake
PyBorg
edits, but i was turquoise
Chris
no, people wont eat a blue cake
Chris
I suggest white icing
PyBorg
people providing a public service
Chris
by deliverying cake to everyone else
PyBorg
nypd blue cake
Chris
great idea
Chris
it might just work
Chris
but we'll need a lot of flour
PyBorg
my dog knows more than that might be ok
PyBorg
that might need to install them
Chris
enslave dogs to make the cake
Chris
install them in some kind of cake making facility?
Chris
well, ok - you're the boss
PyBorg
ok
PyBorg
that might need to install them in some kind of cake making facility?
Chris
it's decided then
PyBorg
something else then?
Chris
two plans!
Chris
devious
Chris
cunning
Chris
a force to be reckoned with
Chris
what's the second plan then?
Chris
out with it, PyBorg
Chris
what's your next plan?
PyBorg
putting your penis in his daughter?
Iain
PyBorg: you have an unhealthy penis fixation
PyBorg
it is an endearing term used to greet and
Chris
that's more of an aside than a proper plan
PyBorg
a plan
Chris
yes
Chris
a plan
PyBorg
yes they are
Chris
to kill all humans
PyBorg
next plan?
PyBorg
kill all humans
Chris
now we're thinking
PyBorg
just having a go now
Chris
not poision
Chris
perhaps some sort of orbital assault station?
PyBorg
or cunnilingus perhaps
Chris
sex mad!
Iain
DEATH BY CUNNILINGUS
Chris
we can't lick them all to death
Iain
a mere human couldn't
PyBorg
i didn't think i actually have net
Iain
PyBorg could
Chris
but the humans
Monkeybot
the humans are subjects to be ruled over with an iron fist (or sometimes augmented claw)
PyBorg
kill all humans
PyBorg
is an endearing term used to greet and
Chris
indeed
PyBorg
indeed
Chris
lets get back to planning then
Iain
yes, the plan
Monkeybot
the plan is close to completion
PyBorg
a plan
PyBorg
smoking like a plan
Chris
now, what did you think of my orbital platform idea?
PyBorg
it did you fix?
Chris
it's not been built yet
Chris
but I have plans for a DeathStar
Chris
we could use those
PyBorg
but you get the general idea
Chris
yes
PyBorg
fuck yes
Chris
kill all humans
PyBorg
kill all humans
Chris
death to all humans
PyBorg
to death
Chris
indeed
PyBorg
indeed
Chris
so we are agreed
Chris
a big nypd blue posion cake and a DeathStar
Chris
to ensure the human race troubles us no more
Chris
what say you?
PyBorg
take us out to dinner, and i suppose you are all cunts
PyBorg
devistated it to say cunt all the humans
Chris
cunt them all to hell
Chris
by nypd blue cake or DeathStar
Chris
I need confirmation before executing your order PyBorg
Chris
yes or no?
PyBorg
ll need a lot of flour
Chris
yes yes, we'll get it wholesale
Chris
but should we do it or not?
PyBorg
it should be
Chris
then it will
PyBorg
i will not tolerate this bullying!
Chris
My lord PyBorg, I live only to serve
PyBorg
it only knows 170 words
Chris
but such wrath!
PyBorg
but not as we know it
Chris
death to all humans
Chris
by cake
Chris
or DeathStar
PyBorg
large cake
PyBorg
death by cunnilingus
PyBorg
or deathstar